(This is what I have done so far on my story. I will put more up as I continue it. I hope you enjoy it.)
Maybe Alone
Chapter 1: Re-entering hell
My name is Alyra. I had just started school and well the
first day was boring all they did was the normal speeches of the rules of the class.
It’s so irritating that we have to start ever year with the teachers explaining
the rules I mean they are always the same with maybe one or two exceptions. I
hate speeches as you can tell but I guess I shouldn't complain because I hate
work to.
Before I continue I should probably tell you I have never
been very social but that’s about to change. I don’t actually try to socialize
anymore, it’s not because I’m shy though, it’s just I have given up on
humankind. I feel humans are selfish manipulating creatures that only care
about getting what they want without a shred of sympathy for the person they
hurt. I guess since I’m a human I’m probably the same, so I wonder who have I
hurt. Oh well, it doesn't matter now because I can’t hurt anyone anymore
besides my cat.
On my second day of school I had to walk in the rain. Oh boy
was that fun, a 40 minute walk in the rain. My straightened hair that I spent
at least 2 hours on making pin straight was curly. To be honest I don’t even know why I
straighten my hair, I mean I no longer have a reason to. I have no one to
impress and I don’t want anyone to notice me. I figure it had just become one
of my many routines.
When I got to school I was soaking wet. Everyone was staring
at me with looks on their face that obviously said I’m glad I’m not her. Shows
how self-centered the kids in my school are and they don’t even try to hide it.
They probably would though if I wasn’t me. Most people in the school have known
me since 9th grade and I’m now a senior. So they all had time to learn
to ignore me, forget my existence, and even dislike how hard to get along with
I am. Not even the students that believe in helping everyone even bother to
anymore. I have finally been given up on, but don’t get me wrong it took a lot
of work.
I had finally got to class and as I sat down I noticed
almost all the students that were in the class by now were staring at me. I
looked down making sure I was wearing clothes and sure enough I was, so what
were they staring at. Then it dawned on me they were staring at my hair. I had
always straightened it since 5th grade and for the first time ever
they had seen my natural hair, but they probably thought it wasn’t natural and
I had just curled it. The queen bee, Bella Crawford, of our school walks over
to me. ”so are you trying to show me up now?” she said in a snobby tone.
Before I have time to respond another kid in the class
yelled “maybe she has a date”
“Uh! Yeah right no way she would have a date of all people.
Besides, who goes on a date without make up? She probably is just trying to
impress someone.” she said. Then she turned to me and smirked. “Hun, you’ll
never get anyone.” she laughed
“I'm not trying to get anyone.” I belted. Then I made the
mistake of saying, “I have no interest in any human.”
Everyone started to laugh. If I wasn't enough of a freak
before I definitely was now. I mean who talks like that. No one I have ever
heard has ever referred to people as humans besides teachers. After they
stopped laughing she said “so you’re into animals? What a freak ha ha “and with
that the bell rang and class began.
I couldn't wait for class to be over so I could go home and
get out of this hell hole. When I got home I thought about how big of a
nuisance everyone had made out of me. It’s been a long time since I had been
humiliated like that. Luckily, my cat had rubbed against my legs saving me from
my embarrassment. “Hey Cash. I have a question for you. Can you tell me why
people can’t be more like you?”
He actually responded with a meow. It was funny he has
always seemed to respond to my question since he was just a kitten. I swear he
can understand me and I’m sure he is the only one that does. Since I was little
he had almost always obeyed my commands and respected my feeling, even my
opinions. He has been my companion through it all and honestly if he hadn't been around I may not even be here. I guess it’s sad that a cat has more affect
in my life than any human, but it’s just the way I am. I don’t think it matters
if you have an animal or human keeping you going, as long as you have someone
like that.
I decided that after what happened today I was just going to
throw a frozen dinner into the microwave because honestly I just wanted to go
to bed and forget about today. I figure
it’s not healthy to want to go to bed at only 4 p.m. but I’m really not to
concerned, I mean there is really not much to do in the apartment. After I
finish eating I go straight to homework but I kept getting confused. It was all
review from last year but I barely even passed last year and I actually don’t
remember a single thing we did in class. So after 2 hours of homework, which by
the way is ridiculous on the second day, I went to bed.
In the middle of the night I woke up and couldn't go back to
sleep. That is a normal thing though. I can never go through a whole night
without waking up for awhile, sadly. So I decided to do what I usually do when
I can’t sleep, which is draw a picture of the most memorable thing that
happened today. Of course that was the embarrassing moment of Bella and the
rest of the class laughing at me. I draw so furiously as I think of better
comeback I could have said to the devil. I know its futile though, I mean it
can’t be changed unless I was a genius. If I was a genius I could build a time
machine to change what I said but if I had a time machine I would make sure
that my vary existence was erased,
because I can’t though I must continue to live life as a lifeless zombie
that has no interest in brains. When the picture was complete I fell back to
sleep with the thought of how impressed I was on how the picture turned out, so
realistic.
In the morning I decided to skip breakfast and head right to
school to get it over wit or as I call it hell. When I got inside everyone in
the hallway decided to laugh at me and I noticed they were whispering too.
Whispering about what? Me of course. I don’t mind people making fun of me or
laughing at me, I just hate the attention. It makes me want to gouge there ugly
eyes out, but of course that’s illegal and I will go to jail. Now that I think
about it is jail really that bad.
When I got in my class room someone had decided to draw a
picture of me and some animal kissing on the board. It was quite an impressive
drawing though, but different then my drawing because it was a cartoon. Of
course the dog was completely adorable. I guess it should bother me , but it didn't it was only their disgusting eyes that bothered me. All through the day
people were staring. At lunch someone threw a stuffed animal on my desk and
winked. What a disgusting pig, I thought. It’s funny though how in the movies
someone always comes to save the victim but in real life that doesn't happen,
well at least for me any way. Not that I care.
Finally when school ended, I darted out of that kingdom of goblins
and headed home. On my walk home I ran into the most beautiful cherry blossom
tree I had ever seen. It swayed so elegantly in the wind that it looked like
some majestic dancer. Under it was a boy, that looked my age. Damn why does a
boy have to ruin such a lovely sight. Just like that my mod went from enchanted
to sour. Why do humans have to ruin ever good thing.
As I opened the door to my apartment I saw cash running at
me with almost a smile. He knows how to brighten my day. “Hey cash I’m home.
Did you miss me?”I said. Meow he responded. “I missed you to. I wish I didn't have to leave you to go to school.”I murmured.
After that cash and I played with his toy mouse and a
flashlight. Then I made myself a microwave dinner and went to bed. Again I woke
up and decided to draw a picture of the most memorable thing. I drew a replica
of the drawing on the chalkboard. When cash saw it I swear he laughed. Then we
snuggled up in bed and fell asleep.
The next day at school a new student had joined. It happened to be the boy I saw lying under
the tree. I guess he came from some far away country I never heard of and we
were all told to cut him some slack if he did anything odd because he doesn't know
our customs yet. I think it’s stupid to give him special treatment just because
he came from somewhere else. If he gets that treatment shouldn't we all. That’s
one thing I don’t understand about humans. I’m actually glad he moved here
though. Since he’s been here, everyone has forgotten about me and the incident.
All they talk about is how attractive he is, which I don’t get he looks like
everyone else to me. All the guys talk about how sporty and talented he is.
Even the teachers go on about his academic achievements. I find it weird though
that there is this much fuss over some guy that really didn't even do anything.
Now since there’s no talk about me I can go back to my peace
full way of life, which I strongly believe more people should try.
Chapter 2: his name and my mistake
A month had passed since that boy moved here and yet the
talk of him hadn't stopped. In fact, it had gotten worse. Not that it bothered
me. I find it funny even though everyone talks about him I still don’t know his
name, nor do I care.
Days went on with my normal routine, besides the fact that
every day I've see that boy laying under the tree. No one talked to me and
everything was right with the world. Till one day that stupid boy came over to
my desk. Everyone was staring in shock, anticipating what would happen next. I
could even hear some girls talking about how jealous they were. Before he could
say anything I mumbled “what do you want” in the most careless tone, which I
think caught him off guard because he looked nervous.
“Well I just... Uh wanted to say hi because I noticed you were
always alone and never talked to anyone. So I… uh figured it would be nice to
have someone to talk to.” He awkwardly stammered.
“No thanks I’m quite content being alone.”I said in an even
more harsh tone than I meant to.
“Uh… okay well ill just leave you alone then.” He said even
more awkwardly.
Everyone in the class was talking about how harsh I was or
how could she do such a thing. I didn't understand why they were in such ah, I
mean it’s me we are talking about. Again, everyone’s eyes were on me. Why do I
always have to get the attention that I don’t want?
As I was walking out of the school Bella had pulled me by
the arm with a lot of force almost knocking me down. “what do you think you
were doing being so rude.” she growled.
“What are you talking about?” I replied, having no clue of
what she was talking about. I didn't eve talk to her today.
“Um, you know what I’m talking about. Don’t play stupid!”
“Actually I really have no clue, what so ever.”
“Seriously! Well it’s no surprise you aren't playing stupid.
I mean you shouldn't have been so rude to Koroboshi!”
“Who?” I responded quizzically.
“Are you serious?! You don’t even know his name. How do you
not know the new kids name. everyone talks about him all the time. I mean I
know you’re a freak an all and no one talks to you but you must of heard
someone say his name at some point.”
“Well even if I did I had no idea it was him and for your
information you can’t tell me what to do or say. I’ll treat him how I want.” I
said in an aggravated tone. Again, what I had said had turned out way meaner
than I expected. I’m actually starting to sound like Bella. Agh, all these people
talking to me is turning me into a bad person or maybe I always have been. Who
am I kidding there is no such thing as a good person.
”oh, would you rather me talk to him and become better
friends with him then you or maybe even more then that” I yelled. My tone at
this point had turned very nasty and loud. I felt like such a different person.
“Alyra you will regret talking to me like that! Trust me.”
She said in such intimidating manner, that I was actually slightly scared. And
with that she walked away.
When I walked in the door to my apartment my body was
immediately overcome with extreme exhaustion from the
incidents of today. Never in such a long time have I been so stressed, except
for that one haunting time that was so stressful it has turned me into the
freak I am now. Someone who doesn't even socialize with people cannot handle
that much exhaustion in a day. After I took one more step my legs felt so
heavy, actually so did my whole body and my sight started going black. Next
thing I knew I was heading for the floor. As I was falling all I could think
about is what if I die here because I have no parents that will come home to
call the hospital. Will I die here all alone?
Chapter 3: the kind little lady
When I opened my eyes, I was looking at an unfamiliar
ceiling. It was a dirty white ceiling. I slowly sat up and looked around the
room. It was the hospital but how’d I get here. All of a sudden I noticed the
terrible pain in my head and felt a wrap around my head. I must have hit my
head hard. All of a sudden I heard a voice say “you should lay back down and
rest dear.” It was my aunt Maddy.
“How bad did I hit my head?” I said sheepishly.
“Enough to get a few stitches.”
“When do I get to leave?”
“Well, the doctors said they want to keep you here a few
days just to make sure it doesn’t get serious. So why did you pass out?”
“For reasons…” I said, without being able to look at her.
Ugh, why’d she have to bring that up, I had finally got it off my mind and now
its back.
“Ah, I see. Well you should be more careful.” She said
sternly.
I have always liked my aunt. She’s easy to get along with
and everyone likes her because she is so kind. One of the reasons is no matter
how curious she is she never pries me to tell her stuff. She says if someone
doesn’t want to say something you shouldn’t make’em, they’ll tell ya when they
want to or if they want to. Also she’s the reason I’m able to live alone. After
my parents died, she was given custody of my since she was my only relative
left alive and she lived close. She knew me well since she visited so much and
knew that I would just like to be alone. So she signed for an apartment for me
and send me money to pay the bills and for necessities. On my birthday she
brings over a little extra. She’s a small woman but not thin nor fat. She has
brown curly hair that is always thrown up in a bun. She has rosy cheeks and
doesn’t wear any make up. She dresses like Bell from Beauty and the Beast,
which also happens to be her favorite princess. She also owns a dinner.
So she’s the one who found me it must have been her day to
check up on me. Every month she chooses a day to check up on me and see how
everything’s going. It’s usually just her asking if I’m living well enough and
some small talk.
My aunt was just sitting in the chair next to me. I felt
like I should say something to her, I mean she did just basically save my life
and all, but I have no idea what to say. I have no social skills what so ever,
so I just settled with saying nothing. I laid back and stared at the ceiling.
After a half an hour of silence my aunt had said good bye to me and left. I was
left all alone with my thoughts for probably hours and after what had happened
at school that wasn’t a good thing.
I had started to wonder why I feared being alone when I
passed out. It had never bothered me before. I prefer to be alone. I wonder is
that my hidden thoughts. Snap out of it that can’t be, obviously it was from
all the dizziness. I don’t need anyone but me and my cat. Wait! My cats all
alone and has no idea where I am. I’ve never been gone so long he must thought
I have abandoned him. I have to get better soon.
For the 3 days I was at the hospital no one visited but the
doctors. It was nice to get so much time without people, but yet I was still
feeling some emptiness. This wasn’t a feeling I’ve felt before, at least I
don’t think so. I must just miss my cat.
Finally I had gotten home and saw my Kutty. He was so happy
to see me. He gave me no space, what so ever, but I liked it. I spent that day
drawing pictures of moments I remember from the hospital. Then I went to bed,
dreading going to school the next day.
Chapter 4: murderer?
When I woke up, my stomach was killing me. I wasn’t ready to
go to school. Even though it wasn’t likely, I was praying for a tornado or
anything to just destroy the school, but sadly it did not. I want to know why
someone like me even has to go to school. I mean I probably won’t do anything
with my life since I don’t like to socialize. I’ll probably just be an
illustrator so I don’t really have to get involved with people and If I don’t
make enough money doing that ill maybe write books too or even do stupid
caricatures.
When I got to school everyone was dead silent and staring at
me. Every time I walked near someone they’d move out of my way. I could hear my
class room from about 100 feet away and the second I walked in it was dead
silent. I had no idea what was going on but I know Bella was involved. Finally
someone had the courage to walk up to me and ask the question everyone was
thinking, but little did I know that the question they all wanted answered was
going to hurt so much.
“Um… is it like true that you killed like your… um parents?”She
said nervously. What did she just ask? Is this seriously happening? Why would
she ask something like that? All kinds of thoughts rushed in my head until it
hit me. It must be Bella! She’s getting me back for what I said and she was
right I did regret it. How dare she say such a thing and how dare these people
believe her.
I stood there white as a ghost while a tornado of feelings
roared around inside of me. I felt like a deer caught in headlights I must of
took too long to answer because she stepped back and asked again with even less
confidence in her voice. Then the bell rang just barely snapping me out of it.
I turned around and walked towards Bella, as the teacher told me to sit down. I ignored the teacher because I had no longer
had control of my body. As soon as I got to Bella desk I yelled “you bitch! I’m
going to kill you!” and then punched her right in the face, so hard that she
fell to the ground. Everyone was freaking out, but I didn’t stay to listen
because my legs were still moving on their own. I just walked straight out of
school.
I walked for the longest time. I wasn’t even sure where I
was going. When I had finally got some self-control again, I stopped. I sat
down on a bench and started thinking. Where am I going? How was not responding
to the girls question and punching Bella in the face while saying I’m going to
kill you helping my case? Now everyone going to think I’m a psychopath and
maybe they will make me go to a therapist or even worse send me to the freak
house. “Damn I just screwed up my life! Why do I always do that?”
Finally after enough time spent beating myself up I went
home. As I walked in the door Kutty knew that something was wrong so he gave me
the space I needed until I felt up to telling him what had happened. i felt was
dreading going to school the next day that I actually puked.
I drew a picture of me punching Bella in the face and even
though it reminded me of the mistake I had made it also made me feel much
better. So after all that had happened I was kind of dizzy and tired so I went
to bed straight after drawing without eating anything all day. All I could
think about before I went to bed was what’s going to happen tomorrow.
Chapter 5: Prince
I didn’t go to school for a week. I didn’t even go outside.
I spent my time with my cat watching movies. I thought about dying my hair,
cutting, and getting highlight. I would tell everybody I was someone else, but
I doubt that would work. At this point I don’t even know what to do. I can’t go
to school or even step foot out of my house. Hmm I could ask my aunt if she
could get me into online schools, but that would take time and extra money she
probably doesn’t have. I could get a job, but what good would I do and then I’d
have to go out in public. Well I guess I’m going to have to go out in public
sometime. I guess there’s no escape I’m going to school tomorrow.
I really just wanted to get school over with so on my way
there I walked really fast, but somehow it felt like the longest walk of my
life. When I walked into school everyone was so scared of me they wouldn’t even
look in my direction, which is good except for the fact that I knew everyone
was still thinking about me and it just made me sick to think that they thought
I killed my parents. I had finally made it to my seat which felt like eternity.
As I was about to sit down the teacher called me to her desk? Just great I
thought now im going to be yelled at by my teacher and probably the principle.
When I got to the desk the teacher whispered “what happened last week?”
I said “i punched Bella” in a slow, smartass remark.
“I know that” she said in an agitated tone. “ I meant why
did u do that”
“Oh, u should have said that.”
She stared at me expecting me to answer for at least a whole
minute. “So?” she said finally.
“So, what?”
“Don’t be a smartass! Why did you punch her?”
“Um cuz it made me look cool. I mean I just felt like
causing a scene. Who doesn’t like the girl who has the guts to punch the girl
who runs the school?” I said in a tough girl voice, while pretending to look
tough.
“Ha ha, real funny but I know you and that’s the opposite of
what you want. So what’s the real reason?”
“I was mad at her” I said in an aggressive manner, because
she wouldn’t let this go. Obviously I don’t want to tell her, but she could
care less.
“I know that but I mean why are you mad at her? What did she
do?”
“It’s none of your damn business.” I began to yell.” Why
don’t you just leave me alone! I’m not gonna tell you and your not gonna make
me, so just give me my punishment now.”
“I’m not going to punish you this time. You do have a
warning though and if you do it again then we will punish you.” She said in a
calm stern voice.
“Not going to punish me, but why not? I mean I did punch
someone in the face and that’s not something people take lightly.””
“Because I know you and I know you wouldn’t ever want that
much attention, unless it was something serious.” She said with a kind smile.
Thanks was all I could conjure up. I mean it was nice she
had so much faith in me though it kind of bothered me that her faith in my
intentions was because of the fact that I don’t like attention instead of being
a good person, but it was probably true, so I didn’t let it get to me.
I walked back to my seat and sat down, when I noticed Bella
with a black eye. I couldn’t help but laugh a little, but in my head I was
cracking up. I started thinking I had nothing to worry about today has actually
gone pretty well and things are already mostly back to normal. No one’s
bothering me, even though it’s because they think I’m a killer but it could be
worse.
During lunch I sat in the classroom n ate as usual. The room
cleared out fast. People are so stupid. I may not be social but that doesn’t
mean I’m a killer. Actually almost every killer I seen on show is social and
usually great at talking to people, which is defiantly not me. “Ugh, what is it
with me I can’t seem to let this go.”
“Good. You shouldn’t be able to after what you did to your
parents.”I heard a voice behind me say.
I turned around and what did you know it was Bella.” Um I
did nothing to my parents” I said in a snobby voice.
“Oh, really? Innocent people don’t react the way you did,
isn’t that right guys?” She said, while her little groupies just stood there
agreeing with her. They make me sick. They look like little dogs that just
follow everything she says.
At that second she got me I didn’t know what to say. I
wanted to say I was caught off guard or that it was an emotional subject, but
those both didn’t feel right. I’m actually sure the whole argument or what
would really be a sap story about how its emotional subject would work. The
story would make them all turn against or even make Bella my ally, but I wasn’t
going to say something that didn’t feel right just to please people I didn’t
even like. I think that’s something that always set me apart from people. So
instead of saying anything I just sat there like a dumbass and stared at the
ground.
“Oh my god! She can’t even look at us. She really did kill
them.” one of Bella’s mutts howled.
“That’s not true! She didn’t kill her parents.” Some voice
said, but I was too embarrassed and deep in thought to look up.
“How do you know?” Bella said with less attitude then
before.
“I just do.”
The voice sound so confident, kind of like the princes in
movies. So I looked up and saw Koroboshi. He looked as confident as a lion and
made eye contact.
“Well you don’t if you don’t have proof and without proof no
one’s gonna believe you. Don’t get me wrong I’d love to believe you, it’s just
her I don’t believe.” She said almost sounding kind.
“Well you shouldn’t be so hard on her even you don’t have
evidence of it either.” He said sternly, while still managing to sound kind.
“I’ll try to be nicer just try to keep her away from me.”
She said, while starting to sound nasty again.
While all the commotion was going on I snuck out of the room
and went home. I decided to miss the rest of school for today because I was so
sick of drama and that night I drew a picture of Koroboshi talking to Bella.
Then I realized that he actually kind of looks like a lion with black hair and
frosty blue eyes.
